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taperoo2k at 02:52am on 19/02/2007
taperoo2k at 02:52am on 19/02/2007Emotionally i feel like i've closed myself off again and because of this i feel quite flat in terms of mood.
This is a never ending cycle for me. I have peroids when i'm fine and full of the joys of spring.
But lately i've been sinking under the weight of all the pressure that is building up inside of me again.
I have therefore shut myself down, in order to try and deal with that pressure.
Of course that makes things worse, though for the moment i have insight into how i am interacting with the world around me.
I shall probably lose that soon and sink into a deep depression.
I'm not really complaining as such, i'm just weary of fighting the same old battle in my head.
I can barely describe what it's like to certain friends and even worse i cannot communicate how i am feeling to those
medical professionals who are in charge of my care.
I am 26 years old and have very little to show for it.
Ah well i guess i'll find way out of this maze that is myself vs the demons inside my head.
Balance is what i seek, balance i cannot find. Chaos is my mind.
And I can't face the evening straight
And you can't offer me escape
Houses live and houses speak
If you take me there you'll get relief
Believe, believe, believe, believe...
Last Flowers till the hospital by Radiohead
This is a never ending cycle for me. I have peroids when i'm fine and full of the joys of spring.
But lately i've been sinking under the weight of all the pressure that is building up inside of me again.
I have therefore shut myself down, in order to try and deal with that pressure.
Of course that makes things worse, though for the moment i have insight into how i am interacting with the world around me.
I shall probably lose that soon and sink into a deep depression.
I'm not really complaining as such, i'm just weary of fighting the same old battle in my head.
I can barely describe what it's like to certain friends and even worse i cannot communicate how i am feeling to those
medical professionals who are in charge of my care.
I am 26 years old and have very little to show for it.
Ah well i guess i'll find way out of this maze that is myself vs the demons inside my head.
Balance is what i seek, balance i cannot find. Chaos is my mind.
And I can't face the evening straight
And you can't offer me escape
Houses live and houses speak
If you take me there you'll get relief
Believe, believe, believe, believe...
Last Flowers till the hospital by Radiohead